Can someone please explain briefly how the ashes are won? how many innings and how many tests etc?

Loads of men stand around while one of them throws a ball at someone who hits it with a lump of tree ,then someone runs after it and throws it back at the thrower to have another go,when he gets fed up he goes for a cup of tea and someone else takes over,When the y are all fed up they burn the lump of tree and that is the ashes.